Elmo: Knee replacement

>Elmo: Knee replacement

In July 2015, I finally replaced my failing left knee with Elmo, a Zimmer NextGen contraption of titanium and silicone. We had a glorious year together before I fell and started the journey to saving Elmo…but that’s another series.

27 09, 2015

How I spent my summer

2017-11-15T19:07:54-07:00

Meet Elmo, a contraption of titanium and silicone, now serving as my left knee My summer didn't include writing about it, which you may have noticed. Sometimes your summers are lazy, where you spend your days in a hammock, listening to the ice melt in your lemonade. You can write about that. Or renovation summers, where the whine of the [...]

How I spent my summer2017-11-15T19:07:54-07:00
12 07, 2015

Severance package

2015-10-31T23:52:11-07:00

Dear The Knee (“TK”); It is with great regret that we inform you that your position as Left Knee for Cynthia Morgan, Human Organism has been made redundant. Beginning Monday, July 13, 2015, all left knee functionality will be managed by a Zimmer Biomet NextGen machine and so your services will no longer be required. […]

Severance package2015-10-31T23:52:11-07:00
20 06, 2015

Drive-by birding

2017-11-15T19:12:37-07:00

"Do anything exciting tonight?" asked my friend Clarissa. ...except that Clarissa isn't really her name. "You writing about this the way you did LAST time?" she asked. I said, well, maybe... "Then don't you DARE use my name. Last time ******** couldn't stop laughing. He said ********** and I didn't know about ********** and that maybe I should ************." (Portions redacted to protect her identity) "I [...]

Drive-by birding2017-11-15T19:12:37-07:00
24 05, 2015

Exit The Knee

2017-07-20T14:05:22-07:00

I’m about to have a body part whacked to bits. The Knee is making a premature exit from the rest of me, because even with a brand new cortisone shot and a full-length metal brace, I limp like a guy in a three-legged race…paired with a piano. He will be replaced by a titanium-and-plastic wonder I’m so far calling “Elmo.” (Hmmm. [...]

Exit The Knee2017-07-20T14:05:22-07:00
21 05, 2015

PEACOCK ENERGY!

2015-11-07T22:00:28-07:00

So yesterday. I'm in line at the market, wrapped up in my own head, mostly thinking about stuff I have to do at home, upcoming surgery (The Knee is making a premature exit, but more about that later), and all that sort of thing. Not, in other words, very aware of my surroundings...when it dawns on me that the woman [...]

PEACOCK ENERGY!2015-11-07T22:00:28-07:00
13 03, 2015

Blue

2015-11-07T22:00:59-07:00

“I wouldn’t exactly call that SUBTLE,” Markie said doubtfully. “Blue. Subtle. Exactly,” I said firmly, so she set to work. By noon, the fading green stripe on my head had been joined by a SUBTLE navy blue fringe peeking out from under my ears. OK, maybe it’s not all that subtle. Maybe it looks as if I mummified my body [...]

Blue2015-11-07T22:00:59-07:00